I’m sitting here staring at my floor in my room right now. It is full of boxes and items strewn everywhere. I move out in 3 days. Saturday. Am I scared? A little. Scared of how the process is going to work. Am I excited? Exceedingly. Am I worried? A little. Of being alone mostly and of having no one there. That is my only worry; that I will be completely abandoned. The funny thing is that when I was younger I always fantasized about leaving and dropping everything and starting fresh and honestly, last year I would have been able to do that. I was ready to do that. Then the spring semester hit and everything changed. I met so many new people and actually lived. Now the two people I still have from all of that, I am afraid to leave. I am afraid to lose. But I learned, this summer, how hard it is to just leave. I had the adventure I thought I would never have until I left this stupid state. . . and I had them right here in this stupid state and town. Quite ironic actually. But now I find I cling to those memories because I am afraid to create new ones. I need to remember that life isn't over. . . it has just begun. And I have many days until it's over. . . and in reality. Life will only last as long as I decide to pursue it. . . that is something I have come to realize.
“We can only be said to be alive in those moments when our hearts
are conscious of our treasures.”